Easel

Previous 49 Pairs is here.

Because there are still so many pairs…so I just keep it simple stupid.

Fezlyn

Flora

Jocelyn

Joriena

Rebecca

14. Fezlyn – I know her during practical in NREB. Last contact…last night (refer previous post).

15. Flora – She was my junior in MRSM Kuching. Few months/years ago she did sms me as anonymous.Huhu.

16. Jocelyn – Classmate during KTDTHB time form 1 till 3. She suddenly sms me out of the blue a few months ago then went missing again.

17. Joriena – Best friend…I couldn’t find any other words to describe…we were schoolmates in MRSM. Last contact was most probably last January. We should meet when she was in Miri but it never happen.

18. Rebecca – She was sitting beside the windows during “night prep” in MRSM. I always knock the window pans to chat with her. When did last contact…few days ago..or is it yesterday…in Yahoo! Messenger.

I hope if one day, it happen that I lose all my memories…when I read back all these posts…they will help. Haha…

I was strolling in the park yesterday…looking for ideas for our final photoshoot. We must go to these specific places to take a picture or two…

Miri City Fan

Last October was my last post about the 49 Pairs.

Here’re the pictures.

Patricia

Roni

Alice

Amelia

Brenda

Corazon

I don’t think I should keep those photos unpublished after so much effort to prepare them months ago. Honestly I am sorry if and only if the persons in the pictures don’t like their own photo especially to be posted on the net. But just be thankful that you all have your own beauty.

Patricia : My classmate from Form 1 to Form 3 in KTDTHB. Last met during 2009 new year.

Roni : My industrial training mate at NREB. Last met yesterday. She came down to town to have a stroll.

Alice : My course mate in UTM. Last met most probably during convocation. She sat beside me.

Amelia : My school mate in MRSM. Last met, umm beyond my recollection…I can’t remember at all. I guess after SPM.

Brenda : My school mate in MRSM. Last met, somewhere at E-mart. There were 2 others during that time.

Corazon : My school mate in MRSM. Last met, when we left MRSM after SPM we never in contact anymore. Just sometime contact virtually.

They are already 13 pairs out of 49. Still quite some…

Okay…let me put it like this…

The first week at home : Wah…it was so fun…great to be back home.

First month at home : Ehem…you started to be treated like a loser.

First half a year at home : Eh…what you loser still doing here?

Anywhere but home.

Since the early time of my age, I always have the urge to be away as far as possible from home. It is always my aim to be a kilometer further from home. To be anywhere but home. Why? Because at home I will always get the allusion of not be able to do anything, allusion of uselessness, allusion of being a loser, and what not. Although I know very well I can do most of the things. Just that I don’t really like to show that I can do them.

Will how you treated made who you are?

So being treated like a loser will make me a loser? Or…is it I am raised to be a loser. I was born to be a champ. Educated to be a loser. Damn it.

It is a sin to be younger. It is a sin to be born. Indeed it is because of sin we all exist here. (Sorry God this is just my anger expression).

The best thing in the world.

The best thing in this world is that we can compare things. Good vs Bad. Loser vs Victor. Rich vs Poor. Better vs Worst. Everything on earth and under the sun is subject to meaningless comparison.

Things that’s unseen.

When at home I have no chance what so ever to do things by myself…in other words I can’t I shouldn’t I shalln’t do anything by myself. I am basicly a loser. But away, when no one see when no one care, I do all thing by myself. Half dead…homeless…crying…lonely…all I do alone by myself with a little faith in God. But when I have everything here…when I don’t have to struggle to get anything…I become a loser and treated like one.

The Needs of Esteem : To gain respect of others.

Now I understand why we should give thanks during hardship and during good days. Because neither is better than the other. Below the diagram of Maslow Hierarchy of Needs. It might explain why. Different level poses different level of needs. Be thankful whenever we get or loose our needs to be remain alive.

(courtesy of Wikipedia)